This past Friday my friends joined me (indulged me, really) in watching all 17 of the music videos from Beyoncé’s recently-released visual album. I couldn’t find any drinking game rules online so I DIYed them. Not the usual fodder for this blog, I know, but I wanted to codify them here. So, without further ado, here are Five Rules for a Beyoncé Music Video Drinking Gamé.
1. Drink for each song title.
Each music video includes the song title within the first 30 seconds or so. Some are simple title cards but others are more clever or discreet. Raise your glass each time you see one to celebrate the gift that Beyoncé has bestowed upon you.
2. Drink when Beyoncé wears jean shorts.
She wears ’em a lot. Most of them look rather uncomfortable. When you see jorts: drink. When you see a jort thong: chug.
3. Drink when Jay-Z makes an appearance, in person or in voice.
This doesn’t actually happen very often – if anything, this album is about Beyoncé moving beyond Jay-Z – but he pops up occasionally to blurt “crown!”, to rap about his foyer Warhol, and to rhyme “breasteses” with “breakfast.” He also does a hilarious drunken shimmy that will remind you of your friend Nordy. Drink for Jay-Z!
4. Drink when Ed McMahon makes an appearance, in person or in voice.
And then pour one out: RIP, Ed.
5. Drink when Beyoncé wears something atop her lovely head (wigs excluded).
Yoncé loves headgear even more than she loves jean shorts. She borrowed a crown from the Queen of Hearts, a beaded headdress from Le Crazy Horse, a veil from the Virgin Mary, and a balaclava from Pussy Riot. Drink whenever you see something new on Beyoncé’s head – except for wigs. The goal is drunkenness, not death by alcohol poisoning.
If five isn’t enough for you, here are a few other ideas:
- Drink whenever food is mentioned (peaches, Skittles, half-naked dinners, etc.)
- If you’ve got love for the Lone Star state, drink when B references Houston.
- Drink whenever a foreign language is spoken (including a French Big Lebowski sample?!)
That’s it – have fun!